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...i'm telling you the truth, i mean this, i'm okay...

August 8th, 2008

thinking it is time for a change... @ 06:26 pm

So I started a blog on blogspot and I think I will try to use it for a while. Most of my friends are no longer on Live Journal, so it may be time for me to make the move as well. This journal has always been a good one to me and I will still check it as often as I can. So friends, keep posting and I will do my best to keep up. In the mean time, if you want to keep up with me and my random (mis)adventures...


...then go there, say hi, and comment often.

December 29th, 2007

the holiday season... @ 03:17 pm

Current Location: living room
mood swing: hungry hungry
soundtrack to my life: TV's on with something

It's almost the new year and I have no idea where 2007 went. I really don't feel like I accomplished much this year, but when I really look back on it I didn't completely waste the year. I made a major move to Chicago, which with everything that came with that, I know I had to acomplish a few things. The move gave me a chance to really look at my life and evaluate what I want out of it. That within itself has made 2007 worth it.

I have realized that I've had to work hard most of my life, but there are times were things just came to me easy and I took advantage of that. I really need to work hard and enjoy the gifts I have been given. I feel like I have been wasting some of my talents since graduating college. I'm not challenged every day like I was then. Therefore I feel like I've been in a rut for the last few years. That's something I'm hoping to work on just because I miss having the unknown to look forward to. I never feared the unknown before...I thrived on it a one time. Now I find myself doing budgets and trying to plan calendar events and it becomes nerve-racking. I know that things are not going to be the same now as they were in college...I've grown, I have new goals and thoughts. But I don't want to grown up to fast. I want to my life while I am blessed to have it. I don't want to waste my time worrying about the future. I want to plan for the future while living in the present.

Well...after that random thought process...my holidays -

The holidays have been better this year than they have been in a while. I actually got into the holiday spirit this year which made the holidays fun again. We got a great Christmas tree and decorated it. Everything was done in silver and red. So pretty! I have pictures and I'll try to post them soon. I got all my Christmas shopping done a little over a week before Christmas day. That's the first time I've ever been able to do that. I shopped start this year and really put time and thought into presents. Therefore I got done early and saved a LOT of money. I did most of my shopping online which made it all very enjoyable. I HATE holiday crowds. I just don't have the energy and patience to deal with them. We went to Target Thursday night, two days after Christmas, and it was still insane. I don't know how people do it.

I was very lucky this year and got some great gifts from great friends. James got me a Video iPod!!! I have never had an iPod and I've wanted one for years. Now that I'm in Chicago and take public transit just about everywhere, it is amazing to have one. I was so suprised...I had no idea he was going to get me one. He told me he was going to fix up his iPod for me so I could have it and I assumed that was still his plan. I'm in love with it! I already have the first two seasons of Gilmore Girls on there and I have started to watch those over again. I have about 8 podcasts I now download. Podcasts are one of the main reasons I wanted an iPod in the first place. It is such a great way to hear what others have to say about specific topics. It's just another way to keep up with what's going on in the world and learn about topics that really interest you.

So yeah...the holidays have been good. I'm looking forward to New Years. I'm not sure what we're all doing yet, but considering post-Christmas bank accounts I think the gang is going to be doing something low key. That's fine with me. I'm a firm believer in how you spend your New Year's Eve/Day is a reflection of the year to come. Therefore, I plan to surround myself with lots of friends and good times to be had by all.

Cheers to the New Year everyone!

*hearts and whatnottery*

December 9th, 2007

I'm not dead yet... @ 01:57 pm

Current Location: Chicago apartment
mood swing: awake awake
soundtrack to my life: Petra Haden

So looking back, I realized that I have not updated any of my blogs since March! That's sad. For someone who throughly enjoys the "blog-o-sphere", and I let myself down. The last real post I made was announcing my move to Chicago. For the most part, that seems like ages ago. So sit back and prepare for an update that's 8 months in the making...

The rest of March and April were spent in Atlanta preparing for the great trek to Chicago. I packed up my entire life, again, and found it hard to purge the things I really should have thrown out years ago. These months helped me realize how amazing my Atlanta friends are and how much I was going to miss them. Everyone at The Center (for Puppetry Arts) was supportive and excited about my decision to move. They threw me a going away BBQ on my last day of work and invited other non-work friends to come as well. I got going away presents (puppets!) and a chance to tell everyone how much their two-year friendship meant to me. It was really sad to drive away that day.

May arrived much faster than I think James and I had both anticipated. We both kept our heads on straight and we were able to secure a great apartment in Rogers Park (north side of Chicago, less than five minutes south of Evanston). We are four blocks from 2 El Train stops on the Red Line. Within 10 blocks we have numerous restaurants, the beach (Lake Michigan), a huge grocery store, a nice size fruit market, a park, a movie theatre and video rental stores, a hotel (in case our wonderful little two bedroom isn't big enough for visitors at any point), and other assorted places. I love being within walking distance of so much. I take the train just about every day and even though it can be difficult to build up the energy to walk there in the mornings, it's the best way to travel.

Moving in resulted in many fun adventures. I threw my back out of wack while we were moving in Atlanta so I was in dull pain for most of the move. James and I were able to get everything in the apartment except the TV (it's huge) and the couch. Chris, Bill, and John came over to help which resulted in the couch not coming in through either door of our apartment, so we ended up lifting it to the back door (fire escape) and bringing it in through the picture window in the hall. It's a long and hilarious story that you would mean having to see our apartment setup to fully understand. But, after that long day, we rewarded our helpers (and ourselves) with pizza and beer.

James came to Chicago with a job offer so he was set. He started working for the company our friend Bill was with and for the most part really liked it. The downside was that he still had a commute similar to the one he had in Atlanta (about a 1 hour drive each way...on a good day). There were also some problems with the company getting their paychecks to them on time, which was made even worse by the fact that he was only paid once a month. Needless to say, Bill soon left the company and James wasn't far behind. I did not find much luck in the job search area and ended up finding a really amazing temp agency in downtown. They found me a job within hours and I began my first job in Chicago with DePaul University. I worked at DePaul in the Office of Student Records. Basically, I did data entry all day. It was the first job I had ever had that did not involve customer service in some way. I never picked up a phone and students rarely (if ever) came to our office. I was given my own little office to sit back and listen to my Ipod all day while I processed student records and documents. Overall, it was a great job. It was a great break from the work I have done over the past 10 years. It did get really boring, really quick and after two months, they no longer needed me. From there I went with another temp job with the American Dental Association. I worked in the Annual Session Office, which is where they plan the annual ADA national conference. It was a good job. Some customer service (over the phone) but it was never 100% of the job. I had interaction with everyone in my office which made the time go by much faster. After two months my job was up. A few of my co-workers really fought to find a way to keep me on but they just didn't have the budget for it. It was nice to know that my hard work was appreciated and noticed by those that matter. So, the common thread in all of this is, I still do not have a full-time, long-term, steady job. It's made things a little harder at times, but overall the pay hasn't been terrible, the temp agency is great, and I've walked away with some great references. The temp jobs have afforded me to be really picky about which jobs I apply for. When I first got to Chicago I applied for just about anything and everything. Now I can really search hard for a job that would really work for me. Now I am with KPMG and I've been here for almost two months. They are one of the world's largest accounting firms. I work as an HR Coordinator and it's great. The people I work with are wonderful. They have been so appreciative of the work I have done for them so far and they keep telling me that they are working their magic to keep me on in any way they can. Considering this was just suppose to be a month long job, I have no reason not to believe them. I've basically decided I am going to stay with KPMG until the end of the year and once the new year begins I will sit down and re-work my strategy on everything.

So, other than the whole work/job thing, things are good. James just started a new job with Avanade (a Microsoft tie-in company). The good news is, he gets a regular paycheck, they pay him to do all his training, he gets great benefits, and the office building is downtown so not more hour drives to work. The bad news is, (well...it's good for him) he will soon be traveling four days a week throughout the Midwest. When he got the job offer, it was a hard decision for him to make since there can be so much travel. But at this point in his life he can do it and really make a name for himself. It's going to be difficult at times but overall this is an amazing opportunity for him and because of that I fully support him in his decision. It's going to be hard once he does start his travel. I've never lived alone and it will be interesting to see what it's like coming home to an empty house four days a week. But I've got some great friends and they have all promised to keep me fully entertained. This will actually be a good thing for me too I think. It will give me a chance to get more involved in hobbies and activities. Plus, it will give me full control of the TiVO...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

I am really glad I moved to Chicago when I did. When I first got here I was in such a rush for everything to happen to me but now, I have realized that if I want to make Chicago my home, why rush everything? Of course I don't need to sit back and do nothing. I just need to let everything happen and take it as it comes. I don't know when I got in such a huge rush to grow up. I have the rest of my life to do that.

The worst part of this move was living those I cared about back in Atlanta. As much as I miss them, I know that if they really are a part of my heart, our paths will cross many times throughout the future. The best part of this whole journey has been the friends I have made in Chicago. In a short time I have had the chance to meet a lot of new people and once again build up a great circle of friends similar to those I had back in Murray. The biggest of these is reconnecting with Chris. By the time I had left Murray so many things had changed between us. We were both searching for ourselves (it was the end of college you know) and ended up being pulled in two separate directions. I think my sudden move to Atlanta saved our friendship. We were to alike, had to many things in common...had to many lines that crossed each other. We sent all of our time together and it put a strain on our friendship. But the growth that we both had during those two years I was in Atlanta and he was in Kentucky/Chicago was exactly what we both needed. The day he came to help up move in he came to the door and when I opened it he smiled, said "Hey Kiddo!" and hugged me. Without a doubt in my mind I knew at that time that were both okay and finally at a place that we both needed to get to.

These past six months have taught me a lot. I have realized things about myself that I don't like and I have made it my mission to change those things. I have realized things that I am missing in my life and I have made it my mission to find those things. I have realized things that I am lucky to have and I have made it my mission to keep those things. But above all...I have realized how much I missed pouring myself into a good blog entry and have now made it my mission to get back to these things.

*hearts and whatnottery*

March 30th, 2007

Me vs. Me vs. You @ 12:34 pm

mood swing: pensive pensive

Me vs. Me vs. You

Why are we always in constant competition? If we are not in competition with someone else, we are in competition with ourselves.

We compete in sports, in love, and in our careers. We compete with our friends. Who has the better car or job or significant other? We compete with our families. Who has the smartest children or the better marriage or the most responsibility within the family? We compete with ourselves. How do I push myself farther or advance above others? How do I look better or feel better than the rest? How do I make my mark on the world? How do I find someone or attract someone or keep someone?

Anything that wasn’t a competition before somehow becomes one. It takes over every aspect of our lives and for some it gets way out of control. So, how do we realize this? What is actually worth fighting for and what is worth letting go?

I am at the age were I should be feeling much better about myself and the decisions I have mad. Yet, I find myself in constant competition, mainly with myself. Lately, I have found myself in a mental competition with my friends and family. I compare my life to theirs. What if I had gone to grad school right after college…would I be any better off? What if I had chosen a major other than Theatre…would I have a better job and career path now? What if I had a way to fix everything I see wrong in my life in an instant…would I be any happier than I am now?

Competition is human nature and in certain settings I believe that it is a much needed advantage. Why does it has to take over every aspect of our lives?

March 10th, 2007

Important Announcement... @ 06:30 pm

mood swing: anxious anxious

Some of you already know this, but for those of you that do not...

I am moving to Chicago! That's right kids, I am now working everything out to move from Atlanta to Chicago by the beginning of May. It is a really long...long story, but I will give you a quick break down of the last few weeks I've had.

Last week - the roommates and I found out that our landlord has a long relationship with the county board of health because he does not keep our properity (and maybe others, who knows) up to code. There are a lot of repairs that were suppose to be done on our house by the time of move in or just shortly after and none, I repeat...NONE of them have been done and we have been living here for about three months. My roommate Ryan and his girlfriend have decided to move back to her home town in Florida so she can be closer to her family and they will be leaving around the first of April. James and I decided that Atlanta just hasn't become the city we wanted it to be and neither of us have the kind of roots that would keep us planted here much longer anyway. Therefore, we decided that we would look into moving to Chicago since we love the city, we have a lot of great friends there, and we had already planed to move there within a few years anyway.
This week - we know that it will not be a problem to get out of our lease and our landlord knows the entire situation and said he would give us a perfect reference if we need it. We talked to our old apartment office and they said the same thing. Tax money came in and at the time when it is the most needed. With the help of our friends that are there and these two amazing books I found we are looking hard at getting a place by mid-to-end April and have found some pretty decent things that are in our price range. James already has communication with a computer company and I have no idea what I am going to do for a job, but I feel like I have a chance to move in a new direction when it comes to a career and I'm really exploring what options I have.

Basically, we have taken on the "now or never" point of view to everything. Both of our bosses know what is going on and fully support our decisions. They also thanked us for coming to them so soon and helping find replacements. Our rental history is great so once we find a place we hopefully shouldn't have much trouble getting it. We do not have a lot of money right now, but since something like this all fell into our laps at once, so glad it was now and not a month or two from now.

We have a lot of work to do in just a few weeks, but I am starting to get a little excited about the idea of living in Chicago. I'm trying not to get my hopes up too high too soon and I am very nervous about finding the right place and finding a really good job to support myself. I just hope that all of these signs are right and this move is what I, and James, need right now.

I am really going to miss my friends at the Puppet Center and the fantastic women in my small group. I am lucky that I made so many good friends in the few years I have been here. I am also lucky that I have a lot of friends that love to travel so many have promised to visit soon...and often. I am really going to miss Stephen. He was one of the main reasons I moved to Atlanta because I missed having him around and now I will be missing it again. But he has Josh to take care of him and I know he will visit often as well. (He love Chicago just as much as I do) I'm not going to get into sappy goodbyes now because this should be a time of happiness and excitement plus a lot of research and concentration.

So...to anyone and everyone in the Chicago area...you will have new neighbors soon! If anyone has any good suggestions of places to look for apartments (neighborhoods you have lived in or know people have lived in) we need all the help we can get. That is our biggest problem right now...we don't know the city well enough to know the different areas and what to look for. Anything that anyone could help us with would make a world of difference.

So...moving party anyone?

xo love ox

February 24th, 2007

social experiments in Myspace-land @ 03:06 pm

After a conversation the other night I started thinking about some things. I am very lucky when it comes to friends. I have a lot of them. Even if I don't speak to all of them or see each of them every day, I know they are there. People can put down websites like Facebook and Myspace all they want, but having them makes it really easy to keep up with old friends. I have reconnected with a lot of middle/high school friends and I have caught up with a lot of people from college.

Because of the conversation I had the other night and the influx of individuals that have found me on Myspace lately, I started thinking about some things. I decided to do a little "social experiment" of sorts and I have made Myspace my base. Using information from the Myspace profile pages of my friends I have come up with the following statistics.

There are some disclaimers: Statistics are based on a) the information written on each friend's page (fact or fiction); b) the information that has been obtained by the experiment conductor (i.e., the stuff you guys tell me).

Here we go…

Number of "friends" on Myspace (as of February 24th, 2007): 273
Number of ACTUAL friends on Myspace (those I have a personal relationship with): 220

Male: 96
Female: 124

Age Range-
20 and under: 10
21-29: 190
30-39: 16
40 and over: 4

Single: 89
"In A Relationship": 56
Engaged: 20
Married: 50
Divorced/Separated: 5

Parent: 37

So that is what I came up with. I already knew that a lot of my friends are married/getting married/close to married/having children/staying single forever/getting divorced. I didn't realized how many of those in my age range are at least in a relationship. Also…this is only a study of those friends on Myspace, so it does not include others I know that do not have a Myspace account. This study does not break down the "in a relationship" status to level of happiness or number of years in said relationship. Also, engaged includes anyone I know that has exchanged rings, gay or straight.

People in my age range are expected to start getting married, to start a family, and be well on their way to having it all. Does this mean that I have done something wrong? Is there a track that we were all placed on at a certain age that we were meant to follow? What happens if you switch tracks or quite possibly derail? If we are meant to be on a "have it all" track in life right now, why are some of us lonely or confused or stressed or just plain bored with life? Can one get back on track once they have derailed and if so, how?

It is already hard enough to live in a consumer driven, narcissistic society with all of the pressure it brings. (Pressures that are forced upon us both directly and indirectly) The pressures of meeting someone that you could fall in love with and make a life with is overwhelming considering all of the other pressures those in their 20's and even their 30's face. The whole thing is too much to handle sometimes.

So, where do we go from here? If we find ourselves derailed, how do we get back on track? How do we switch tracks if we do not like the one we are on? How do we find someone that is compatible enough to your wants and needs so you can share parts of your track with them? Should we focus on one track at a time (i.e. career, relationships, family) or just keep pushing forward until something just falls on the tracks in front of us? For that matter…why are we on a track at all? Why can't we just walk?

If we do not fill the expected mold...have we failed?

February 11th, 2007

update...TO THE MAX! @ 03:47 pm

mood swing: satisfied satisfied

I haven't updated in way to long so I wanted to let you guys know what has been going on.

My birthday was January 20th…I am now a quarter of a century old. Doesn't really feel any different (does it ever after you turn 18…maybe even after 21?) but I have decided to grow up a little more and really try to get my life and everything in as much order as I can. My birthday was great…one of the best I've had. It lasted about a week so that always makes it worth it! The basic rundown is:

Friday, the day before my birthday, I worked during the day but we ordered pizza and my boss got me a cake. She also bought me an assortment of coffee creamers to put in our new office fridge. I got a card singed by a lot of my co-workers which was really nice. That night James and I went to Kroger and got lots of junk food. We rented $1 movies from the new machines at Kroger and invited our friends Dan and Aline over.

Saturday was my actual birthday. I had the day off from work so I slept in until around 9ish. Talked with my mom for a while and then got up to get ready. I went to say hi to everyone and when I walked out of my room there was a folding table in front of my door with a homemade birthday cake (done by Ryan…his first time making a cake – very good cake by the way) and an assortment of presents from Ryan and Jesse. Once everyone got up and got ready, James, Ryan, Jesse and I went to eat lunch at Panera Bread Co. – so yummy. Then they blindfolded me and took me to my big surprise of the day…they got me tickets to the Georgia Aquarium! It was the best…so much fun. We were there for hours! We also went through the tank tunnel twice just because it was that great. After that we went back home and they made me dinner (stuffed chicken breasts, green bean casserole, salad, and twice baked potatoes). We went to CJ's Landing after that for drinks. We left there to go to Dad's Garage for Puppet Slam. All in all, a great birthday.

Throughout the week I was busy every night. I went out Tuesday night with my small group girls to Murphy's in the Virginia Highlands for dinner and wine tasting. It was my first official wine tasting and it was great. Wednesday night I went to a birthday party for my good friend Jacqueline which helped me keep up my own birthday spirit by helping her celebrate hers. I went to a sneak preview Thursday night with my friends Aline and Catherine. The rest of the week and the weekend we did random things. I got some great gifts…which no one had to do of course, but I'm very excited that people cared enough to get me something.

Since the birthday I have been working a lot. We have had day and evening shows for the last few weeks and one of the other managers was out for about three weeks because his father passed away. Now that work has slowed down I'm trying to catch up on everything I put off for a couple of weeks. I'm still trying to clean and organize my room. I still have a few things in boxes from the move but hopefully once the weather is a little warmer it will give me the energy to do more. I always get so lazy in cold weather. All I want to do is wrap up in blankets and sit around.

As for everything else - I am still meeting with the girls in my small group and they are wonderful. I look forward to meeting with them each and every week. I think we are all going to this Valentine's Day singles party on Wednesday that is being hosted by a friend of a friend. I'm trying to go to more theatre around town because there are a lot of shows I want to see. Lucky for me Stephen works for Atlantix (the Atlanta equivalent of the TKTS booths in NYC) and I hope to save money by going through them more. I will hopefully have tags and everything for my truck soon and that will help me out a lot. I really miss having a vehicle. I will hopefully find out more about XPT this week…hopefully I'll get an interview. I am also working with my friends Jacqueline and Margie on their textile art show. It will be in April at the Eyedrum here in Atlanta. The show is called, "Daddy I Want A Pony" and it has been fun helping them come up with things to do for it so far. I might also design and make a couple of hand bags/totes for the show. I have wanted to make a few things so I'm going to looking for some good fabrics and materials these next few weeks. So I'm just trying to stay busy and do as much as I can.

It's almost March! That means SETC + Sarina! + all Murray peoples + other possible visitors throughout the month. Also, I have started planning two trips…Chicago (hopefully sometime in April and with the help of my tax returns!) and Ireland. I have never been outside of the US and it is one of my life goals to travel there. I have a lot of money to save and a lot of planning to do, but I have already started some foundation work on it so it will be done! I even found my travel partner already and I couldn't ask for a better one.

Okay, I need to get some stuff done. I'm excited that it is Sunday. Tonight after work I am going to go home, curl up on the couch and watch some movies we rented. Then I have the next two days off. Everyone read this and say HI because I miss you all terribly.

*hearts and whatnottery*

January 14th, 2007

always look on the bight side of life... @ 04:37 pm

(xposted on myspace blog)

It's less than a week until my birthday. I'm getting a little excited and I don't really know why. I've always been a pretty big birthday person. I think that everyone should have one day to do whatever they want. Be by yourself or surrounded by friends and family…go to the movies or throw a party. Whatever you want to do you should do it because you have been blessed with another year of life. Sure life is hard and feels like a constant struggle, but who is to say it will always be that way.

I made it a goal for the new year to get back to my once optimistic lifestyle and I have to say that the last few weeks have been pretty good. Of course things are not going to change all at once, but I'm feeling a little better about some things. At some point I just lost a lot of the control I had on my life (I guess that is what graduating college did to me) and I found myself only looking at the negative things. Things could be getting better…or maybe I'm just looking at them differently. Either way, I doing anything I can to complain less, smile more, and only worry about the things that really need time and thought.

Last night I went to Borders with my friend Wade after work. We sat in the café and threw around some ideas for our project proposal for XPT (Xperimental Puppetry Theatre). Basically, XPT is a showcase that the Center for Puppetry Arts does each May. (For my Murray theatre people…think Sock and Buskin studio festival with puppetry and all of the various arts forms that go along with it.) Each piece lasts about 10 minutes and the project directors (in our case, myself and Wade) are pretty free do to whatever they want because it is part of our Adult series (18+ age crowds only!). If you have a moment, go to - http://puppet.org/perform/xpt06.shtml - for more info. I will make sure to update everyone and let you know if our piece gets selected. They usually have 8-10 pieces and last year they had around 30 projects submitted. Needless to say, it is a pretty big deal to get a piece into XPT.

Of course this new creative outlet has really helped lately. I've been thinking on pieces for XPT and while doing that I have come up with a couple of ideas for some one act plays. I also have an idea that I need to write out because I think it would go over well for Puppet Slam (a variety/sketch show that is kind of like SNL for puppets) and if it turns out how I think it will, it should be hilarious.

I'm excited. I am excited about theatre again. I am excited about creating again. It has been way to long. Hopefully the feeling we last…hopefully the creative flow will continue. I really have missed this part of my everyday life.

Oh, and on a fantastic note – March is going to be the best month EVER!
First week of March – SETC!
Second week of March – Sarina will *hopefully* be extending her trip into this week (and she better because I miss her and I have already started to plan things!)
Third week of March – My mom will be coming down to visit. This will be her first time in Atlanta, so I'm excited to show her around.
Fourth week of March – Dave might be coming down to visit…woo!
Fifth week of March – okay, there is no fifth week in March, but after these first four weeks, I really wish there were.

November 21st, 2006

moving on... @ 09:50 pm

mood swing: listless listless

So I have, at the most, one month to figure out my entire life. Okay, maybe not my entire life, but it feels like it lately. I have to figure out where I'm going to live, how I'm going to afford everything, and what I should be doing with my time.

I've been thinking long and hard about going to grad school. It was my plan all through college. Until my last couple of semesters I knew exactly what I was going to be doing after college...go through three more years of school. I got to the point of burn out before graduation so I decided to delay grad school. Now that I've been out of college for almost two years I am not happy with where I am. I am not progressing like I wish I were. I do not feel like I am working hard enough. There is so much I could be doing and I'm not. I like my job, but I don't want to do box office work for the rest of my life. I'm afraid that I will if I don't try to do more now...before it is to late.

As to where I will go...I don't know. The lease on our apartment is up Jan. 1st. I pretty much have until then to get almost everything figured out. As of right now, I have three options -

1) Get a three bedroom apartment with James and Ryan, live in Atlanta, and keep looking for where I should be and what I should be doing.
2) Get a one bedroom apartment, live in Atlanta, most likely get a second job just to make sure I can afford everything, and keep looking for where I should be and what I should be doing.
3) Move back home to Kentucky for a little while, find a job...or two, save some money, apply to grad schools, and start school in the fall.

As much as I would like to go with option number one, I don't know if everyone living together will give us all the room we need to grow and do what we all came here to do. Option number two has been stressing out over bills and money (like I don't do that enough already), but I would finally have the chance to live on my own since I never have. Option number three is the one that makes the most sense. I need to get my finances in order and I need to find ways to save as much money as possible.

I am so greatful that I have a mom that loves me and supports the decisions I make so I know going home for a while won't be a problem. It has just been so long since I've been home for more than a few days. I barely talk to anyone there anymore. My life is completly different than it use to be. Thanks to the internet I have been able to get back in contact with some good friends and that helps. The one thing that has really been bothering me about leaving is the fact that I have finally started to make some great friends here. I have my co-worker friends, my small group (which, at this point I cannot think about leaving behind), my roommates, and every one else. I have found an amazing church. I love being able to go out and eat whenever. I like having a public transit system. I love being in a city!

I just don't know what to do. Time seems to be moving so fast. I actually thought about it today. I need to have a decision by Christmas at the latest. One month. I have one month. I made the decision to move to Atlanta and I was here within a week. Why was it so easy to leave everything behind then? How did I make a decision like that? Why can't I make a decision like that now?

November 11th, 2006

(no subject) @ 05:18 pm

If you've seen it, give it a number, see how many you have watched at the end.

(1) Rocky Horror Picture Show
(2) Grease
(3) Pirates of the Caribbean
(4) Boondock Saints
(5) The Mexican
(6) Fight Club
(7) Starsky and Hutch
(8) Neverending Story
(9) Blazing Saddles
(10) Airplane

(11) The Princess Bride
(12) Young Frankenstein
(13) Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy
(14) Napoleon Dynamite
(15) Saw
(16) White Noise
( ) White Oleander
(17) Anger Management
(18) 50 First Dates
(19) Jason X

(20) Scream
(21) Scream 2
(22) Scream 3
(23) Scary Movie
(24) Scary Movie 2
(25) Scary Movie 3
(26) American Pie
(27) American Pie 2
(28) American Wedding
(29) Harry Potter & the Philosopher's/Sorcerer's Stone

(30) Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets
(31) Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban
(32) Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire
(33) Resident Evil
(34) Resident Evil 2
(35) The Wedding Singer
(36) Little Black Book
(37) The Village
(38) Donnie Darko
(39) Lilo & Stitch

(40) Finding Nemo
(41) Finding Neverland
(42) 13 Ghosts
(43) Signs
(44) The Grinch
(45) Texas Chainsaw Massacre The original
(46) White Chicks
(47) Butterfly Effect
(48) I, Robot

(49) Dodgeball: A True Underdog Story
(50) Universal Soldier
(51) A Series Of Unfortunate Events
(52) Along Came Polly
(53) Deep Impact
(54) Kingpin
(55) Never Been Kissed
(56) Meet The Parents
(57) Meet the Fockers
(58) Eight Crazy Nights

(59) A Cinderella Story
(60) The Terminal
( ) The Lizzie McGuire Movie
(61) Passport to Paris
(62) Dumb & Dumber
( ) Dumb & Dumberer
(63) Final Destination
(64) Final Destination 2
(65) Halloween
(66) The Ring

(67) The Ring 2
(68) Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle
(69) Practical Magic
(70) Chicago
(71) Ghost Ship
(72) From Hell
(73) Hellboy
(74) Secret Window
( ) I Am Sam
(75) The Whole Nine Yards

(76) The Day After Tomorrow
(77) Child's Play
( ) Bride of Chucky
(78) Ten Things I Hate About You
(79) Just Married
( ) Gothika
(80) Nightmare on Elm Street
(81) Sixteen Candles
(82) Coach Carter
(83) Bad Boys

(84) Bad Boys 2
(85) Joy Ride
(86) Se7en
(87) Ocean's 11
(88) Ocean's 12
(89) The Bourne Identity
( ) Lone Star
(90) Bedazzled
(91) Predator
(92) Predator II

(93) Independence Day
(94) Cujo
( ) A Bronx Tale
(95) Darkness Falls
(96) Christine
(97) E.T., the Extra-Terrestrial
(98) Children of the Corn
(99) My Boss' Daughter
(100) Frailty

( ) Best Bet
(101) How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
(102) She's All That
( ) Calendar Girls
(103) Sideways
(104) Mars Attacks
( ) Event Horizon
(105) Ever After
(106) Forrest Gump
(107) Big Trouble in Little China

(108) X-Men
(109) X-2: X-Men United
( ) X-3: The Last Stand
(110) Jeepers Creepers
(111) Jeepers Creepers 2
(112) Catch Me If You Can
(113) The Others
(114) Freaky Friday (old)
(115) Freaky Friday (new)
( ) Reign of Fire
(116) Cruel Intentions
(117) The Hot Chick

(118) Swimfan
( ) Miracle
(119) Old School
(120) The Notebook
( ) K-Pax
(121) Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring
(122) Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers
(123) Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King
(124) A Walk to Remember
(125) Varsity Blues

(126) Hitch
(127) The Fifth Element
(128) Star Wars, Episode I: The Phantom Menace
(129) Star Wars, Episode II: Attack of The Clones
(130) Star Wars, Episode III Revenge of The Sith
(131) Star Wars, Episode IV: A New Hope
(132) Star Wars, Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back
(133) Star Wars, Episode VI: Return of The Jedi
(134) Troop Beverly Hills
( ) Swimming with Sharks

(135) Air Force One
(136) For Richer or Poorer
(137) Trainspotting
(138) People Under the Stairs
(139) Blue Velvet
(140) The Sound of Music
(141) Parent Trap 1 (old)
(142) Parent Trap 2 (new)
(143) The 'Burbs
(144) The Terminator

(145) Empire Records
(146) SLC Punk
(147) Meet Joe Black
(148) The Nightmare Before Christmas
(149) The Silence of the Lambs
(150) Sleepy Hollow
(151) I Heart Huckabees
( ) 24 Hour Party People
( ) Blood In Blood Out

my only goal was to make sure i've seen more of these than chris...I have, but considering the list, who is to say I have actually won. hrmm...

...i'm telling you the truth, i mean this, i'm okay...